RATTLEGURGLE
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The rattlegurgle (acantrocius acantrocius) is a mammal of the family of acantrocidae.
A significant peculiarity of the entire family is the unique attraction that they appear to hold for giving a bad impression.
For the sole purpose of publicly deface, the rattlegurgle simplex or rattlegurgle of the wetlands (which is the most common species) may even want to travel long distances, rousing from the mental and physical inertia where he likes to linger throughout the day.
DESCRIPTION
The physical appearance of the rattlegurgle of the wetlands is not particularly elegant. It is about 1 ft. tall (but some specimens may reach the size of 1ft. 4 in.), its abdomen is quite pronounced and it has a thick brown colored coat (except in the mating season when it becomes tinged with a reddish and vaguely embarrassing hue).
It has big, strong and crooked teeth and feeds mainly on what is on the ground as close as possible to where he stands or sleeps (cfr. the saying "eat like a rattlegurgle").
He also has large, bushy eyebrows and small black eyes.
A notable feature is the long tail of the animal that seems highly to embarass it, not to say even annoy it.
His verse is the "rattle gurgling" (see the saying "rattle gurgling like a rattlegurgle") that sounds like a can of bolts poured down the drain of a clogged sink.
Overall, the rattlegurgle of the wetlands is a happy animal in its environment: the wetlands.
He can not swim and loves to prove it.
SOCIAL BEHAVIOR
Because of its largely peaceful nature, there have been a few attempts to train the rattlegurgle, as watch or pet.
It was soon discovered, however, that it can not be trained to do anything since its sole purpose in life seems to be to collect as many mistakes in the performance of even the simplest tasks.
Because of its unspeakable stupidity (or its peculiar intelligence), the lust for failure of the rattlegurgle is generally matched only by its complete and utter uselessness.
In fact, when entered into any ecosystem, it does not damage it, nor improve it. Simply it does not affect it in any way, impossible as it may seem, due to its laziness, laxity and love for errors understood as a systematic dedication and purpose of life.
It is also the only social animal to consider ulcer as a status symbol and to put up with the most trivial incidents as an indispensable necessity of life.
Other than jumping into the water while not knowing how to swim, the rattlegurgle of the wetlands, usually, is lying in the shade, asleep.
Overall, given its propensity to make a mistake even in its slightest gesture, it was not possible to draw a more precise characterization of its activities, like hunting or dwelling. Let alone mating.
BIBLIOGRPHICAL NOTES
J. J. Huffmann - K. Benson . pg. 151-2152 "Most boring mammals" - 1951 W. Berlin | B. Lee . pg. 1745 "Enter the rattlegurgle" - 1973 - Hong Kong | E. Pungitopo - G. Schiappacasse. "The amazing Rattlegurgle of the wetlands" - 1995 - Bargagli |
K. Mauser. pg. 7 "I can't beleieve it. It smells awful!" - 1959 - Lugo di Romagna | Bhagwan Bevevibava . chapter 1-6-151 "Most boring mammals revised" 1990 - Goa |